clubhousepow

the fate of Who drummer Moon?

2005-04-16T23:31:00.000-07:00

Rumor has it that one of the final things manic Who skinsman Keith Moon did mere hours prior to his death was view "The Abominable Dr. Phibes." I'm CAREFULLY going upstairs and going to bed now . . .

('course, I believe he also had a bellyful of booze and was found in a pool. I have a single Leinenkugel in the 'fridge and the closest I can come to a pool is the dog's water bowl in the hallway.)

2005-04-16T23:02:00.000-07:00

what I wouldn't do for one of these on my mantle!

THE ABOMINABLE DR. PHIBES ***

2005-04-16T22:42:00.000-07:00

One could summarize this AIP novelty in a simple phrase: "Dr. Phibes exacts revenge on 9 surgeons and kills himself, roll the credits." However, that would be doing this near masterpiece of set design, costuming, and panache a disservice. A virtually expressionless and speechless Vincent Price plays wax-faced Dr. Phibes, a burn victim whose wife perished at the hands of a gathering of doctors and surgeons. Each one befalls a fate torn right from the pages of the Old Testament (though Phibes' interpretation of the plagues is sometimes quirky at best: a catapult-launched brass unicorn's head?!). Pretty tough not to dig a film like this, every frame seems drenched in garish color and lunatic set design. The big question: when is Tim Burton doing a remake? Treads lightly between the horrific and the humorous to good measure. Though essentially plotless, it places itself nicely among the pantheon of classic revenge films, dating all the way up to Kill Bill. I guess Phibes "Rises Again" in a sequel.

From Latin, SPOLIA

2005-04-10T19:59:00.000-07:00

May 19, 2005 rapidly approaches. Let the spoilage begin! As we speak, the hardcover novel is stacked high at your neighborhood big block bookseller. Various other tie in tomes as well (e.g., The Art Of..., Comic Adaptation, The Making of..., etc.). Best of all spoilers, though, this link. Follow if you dare, oh friends of the Clubhouse. (and be sure to have MSWord handy.) It certainly seems legit. ("L-what?" "Legit!" "L-why?!" . . . sorry . . . any opportunity for a Johnny Dangerously reference, y'know)
So we'll see how it all goes. Sorry for the lack of action 'round these parts lately. To my credit, I watched 1/2 of an Audrey Hepburn flick called Paris When It Sizzles the other day. It was an incredibly mediocre film that, for some reason, annoyed the hell out of me enough not to want to write about it.
And now I just did.
Damn.
By the way, has the word "spoiler" been inducted by whoever lords over the official new English words yet?
What I love most is I got through this entire post without using the words STAR WARS.
And now I just did.
DAMN!

oh, and that crazy picture down there...

2005-04-03T23:35:00.000-07:00

Me n' the Walrus obsessed over a wacky German sex flick called She's 19 and Ready way back when. This group, Dschingis Khan, shows up at midpoint for no reason and belts out a tune. They have been described as "the Village People, if the Village People were Mongol invaders, not gay New Yorkers."

SIN CITY ***

2005-04-03T23:21:00.000-07:00

Wow, for the first time here in the clubhouse, we're gonna' be mildly topical. So I braved the crowds for a PREMIER day showing of Sin City. Though I did have a minor flirtation with the comic industry in the 90's, my exposure to this book was minimal. However, what little I did peruse I certainly enjoyed. It was obviously stylish and more than a little clever. The movie mirrored these attributes nicely. The film bogs down slightly in its midsection but only because so much is thrown at us so relentlessly. This is more the fault of the material than the film. I don't think anyone would desire to sit and READ this much Sin City in one sitting, let alone have their senses attacked in 5.1 digital. This is probably a personal preference gripe, though. I'm 34, and a geriatric one at that. I can entertain the possibility that I'm just outside the target market here.

I can't rave enough about the man behind the lens. I await the day when, as the late, great Bill Hicks prophesies, L.A. will drop in to the drink and the west coast's one distinguishing feature will be "Arizona Bay." When this occurs, all film activity will move to Austin and Troublemaker Studios will be king. The man works hard, cheap, and is consistently entertaining, almost to a fault, chocking more information into a single frame than most directors do in a lifetime. They say this film could be the start of a new revolt - timed, coincidentally, with the splintering of Miramax and Disney. And with spring. Hope and optimism abound.

2005-04-01T08:47:00.000-08:00

This is Eurodisco supergroup Dschinghis Khan!

2005-03-29T22:15:00.000-08:00

better poster art than the DVD!

ATLANTIC CITY ***1/2

2005-03-29T21:44:00.000-08:00

Great filmmaking and stunning storytelling to spare. Burt Lancaster (who is, obviously, brilliant) plays an amiably classy slug named Lou who takes advantage of people when he's not being taken advantage of. Susan Sarandon is an ambitious oyster bar hostess out to raise her station in life and see the world. These two honorable losers gel amid a tale of misplaced cocaine, ill-gotten green, and the decaying boardwalk of Atlantic City. Perfectly understated method of telling a sensationalistic tale by maestro Louis Malle. Surprising touches of dark humor abound. Look for Wallace Shawn as a waiter. And remember, if you got goods to sell, take it to room 307!

JERSEY GIRL ***

2005-03-24T22:10:00.000-08:00

Man I wanted to loathe this film. Not being a particular fan of anyone involved (Smith, Affleck, Liv Tyler...yech!), I was in the bullpen, wringing my critical hands together, prepared to give it the Ginsu Knife across a tin can treatment. And the critic in me wants to spill it like it is: yes, it's cloying, manipulative, and more than a little obvious. However, I'm a Dad. A Dad of two remarkable girls. And more than a few scenes just outright worked. By the end, I'm a slave to this film's sentiment. Simplistic in execution, what it lacks in laughs it makes up for in genuine pathos. Affleck and especially Tyler actually pull this material off too. Now, if you'll pardon me, I'm going to go ram my head against a fence for falling for this claptrap. RATS!

STRIPES * 1/2

2005-03-19T20:49:00.000-08:00

I remember loving this film as a kid and thinking it was the coolest thing since pudding pies but man does it not hold up or what?! Begins strong with Murray playing the affable loser bit but the lion's share of laughs seem to come from Harold Ramis, John Larroquette, and John Candy. A drawn out mud wrestling sequence doesn't hurt and Warren Oates is appropriately nuts but this thing falls apart so painfully by the final reel that it's ultimately a mish-mash of nothing. I'm scared. How many other sacred cow comedies of my youth suck now? The Blues Brothers, Caddyshack, Stir Crazy???? Who knows? I'll have to put them to the test. Stay tuned...

Retch-o-Rama

2005-03-15T10:33:00.001-08:00

Sick sick and even more sick. Five days along with a flu. I'm getting good at it though. The doe-eyed look for extra sympathy, the heart-wrenching moan to elicit a nice "awwww" from anyone in earshot.
Okay, I've seen a vision of the future when it comes to the Clubhouse and it fortells of a cool gust from the winds of change. There's no frackin' way I'm going to watch a movie a night. Who was I kidding? I have two kids and a wife! I try to write and make movies! I sleep all night and I work all day, I chop down trees, I skip and... you know the rest.
So, I'll just keep pumping entries into this thingy and hope that, on occasion, a film review or two will sneak in.
Can you believe it, I actually had BLOG-GUILT! I'd log on and stare at the passing of the hour and fret at my lack of Blogability.
So now, at least I can sleep.

2005-03-15T10:33:00.000-08:00

TAPE *1/2

2005-02-28T09:53:00.000-08:00

I admire Richard Linklater---a LOT. Slacker made me want to slack, Dazed and Confused made me want to smoke, and Waking Life made me want to, um, er, sleep, I guess. Hell, I even dug his take on the post-modern family film with School of Rock (which made me feel much better about him helming the otherwise unnecessary forthcoming Bad News Bears remake). But I just couldn't find any real worth or value to this film other than a nifty weekend experiment that happened to make it into distribution. Ethan Hawke sharpens his chops with due proficiency and Uma Thurman is oddly arresting in her brief role but the FIRST HOUR is basically predictable dialog that's, I guess, supposed to be alternately deceptive and revealing? Perhaps this was not the best choice for the tail end of a Saturday night double feature (see COFFY below) but this was strikingly flat, nonetheless. I will always admire a Digital Video feature for the effort but features like this will vanquish the movement quite tidily, if you ask me.

COFFY ***

2005-02-26T22:03:00.000-08:00

Pam kicks it hardcore in this nasty visit to the core. She's a nurse whose little sis went wacky on the junk. She's in love with a gubernatorial condidate who's playing all sides in a bid to bring power to the people. As slick as Coffy is, she takes a beating too. Catfights bust out of nowhere. Sleazemeister Jack Hill helmed this one and it's really, truly seedy, very authentic. Sometimes it's almost too creepy. No one really is particularly redeemable. . . so they all die, usually with a pump-action shotgun. Robert Doqui is a superfly pimp named King George (dead.) Linda Haynes (oh where art thou Linda?!) is a hooker who gets all sliced up trying to grab Coffy's razor-blade loaded 'fro. Alan Arbus (Dr. Sydney Friedman?!!!!) is the kingpin behind all this lunacy, a kinky wiseguy named Vitrano. When it comes to classic Blaxpoitation, you certainly can't do much better than this. An obvious Tarantino source of inspiration. In fact, a few bits of incidental music were recycled in Jackie Brown.